Greater objective

Here I am, buried under 50+ lecture notes, moaning and complaining about life and its general suckiness. Of course I am trying to over exaggerate the predicament I am in as a defense mechanism for some consolation if I don't do well. In general, most university students suffer through this (well, if you are like me, not revising until the last minute) and I am not as special as I led myself to believe.

This is just my first year, six weeks worth of lecture and lab materials and now I lay there, defeated even before the war, waving a white flag. In crucial times like this is when I like to ponder about the big questions in life (yes, my procrastination has reached the level which includes philosophical thoughts) while munching on some cookies.

Why am I here? What's God purpose for me here? All those questions that seemed to escape my mind in my daily life which only surfaces when the critical period is around the corner. A mini existential crisis if you will.

I have come to this conclusion on my own-which says a lot about the wisdom embedded in the the conclusion you will see next.

Screw this. Yup, you heard me (or rather see what I typed), screw this. I got on this train to Academy-Torture-Ville (a proof that my originality has deteriorated) to become something bigger than myself. The intent was to help and I knew I was going to suffer (to put it melodramatically) to achieved that. Sometimes I lose sight of what is important when lecture notes are constantly shoved in my face and occasionally (okay, more often than not) cookies, but I digress.

There is always a greater objective than passing exams and studying but to achieve it, I have to go through crappy periods of living like a zombie and sobbing in a fetal position.

As eloquent as ever Ricky, keeping it classy.